This album "ECLECTIA" is a part of a triple release called "The Chris Webbe Song Book" It includes an acoustic version of "Suitable Lies" which deals with domestic violence and appeared on the Summernats Sweaty Palms release in 1992 as well as others dealing in subjects from the serious to the sublime. I have reduced the fight between the left and the right to a game of tennis and threw in a tune about cats. There is even a song dedicated to Gimley from Lord Of The Rings. Best taken with a glass of wine on the deck.




You might not think very much of that little life
Living in that squalor and dying in strife
While you sit there in judgment with your beautiful wife
And butter you bread with a silver knife.

Maybe you think its not important to them
After all its the third world and modern time when
Progress is more important than a little life to defend
And you make the rules so there free for you to bend.
But this little life has a family 
Feelings, a heart and a mind to see
Just like the privileged likes of you and me
In a child’s mind this little life can still be free
Even if her family is dead 
Or its weeks since she had a morsel of bread
Even if soldiers hold a gun to its 
Head this little life like you, deserves to be fed
Think of all the wonders your life contains
Stored between you spirit and you brain
Then think this little life is just the same
Could you then rethink your position again
This torment and horror we see on the news
Is easy to think of as unfortunate abuse
But don’t be complacent and don’t be confused
Each one of those little lives is just like you 
And to some spin doctor it collateral loss
But what is it to you if you are the boss
Just strip it down and remove all the gloss
All life is sacred even the lost.


Out on the court under the sun
The game of politics has begun
The crowd lines up to cheer for their team
The fat cats are ready to lick up the cream.
The players on the left run a principled game
With impractical strokes but a lofty aim
Justice for all and perhaps Idealistic
Unruly rabble and quite unrealistic

The practical serve of the team on the right
Has lead the game into an unprincipled fight
Win at any cost, it will be good for us all
Or at least those of us who own the bat and the ball
What’s left of these principles if you can’t make them work?
Mummy won’t you save me from the boogieman
What’s right with this picture now you got all the perks
Daddy won’t you buy me a middle man
Over the net the rhetoric gets higher
As everyone’s accused of being a liar.
The spectator’s necks twist to and fro
Not even the umpire is in the know

Tell me have we outgrown this game
Now all the players start to look the same
One plays a serve without any thought
And the other runs a racket to win centre court

But the spectacle rules, the game hasn’t changed
The court of opinion has become deranged
The next match starts with the same excuse
But you know the score just like before ,,, deuce


But I’ll go on and I’ll believe
Its tricky though I must concede
In our own minds we sow the seed
Of everything from need to greed.
So important we think we are
Better than the animals and the others by far
Defined by our clothes and our fancy cars
Just a blip, on Gods radar.
You get to choose what you think
And if you can’t, hey well have another drink
And with a smile, a nod and even a wink
Where from comes this terrible stink.
We made this cold world for ourselves
We built our own material hell
A quick check of history will surely tell
All the great ones, eventually fell
Money, power, and fame
Round we go, again and again
Till everything just seems to be the same
With no one but ourselves to blame.
I can see it happening here today
Nothing new I hear you say
Things have always, been this way
Just another, doggy day
The only difference seems to be
Some act on their faith and some fail to see
If life has a purpose, it is surely free
To you, and even unto to me

Everywhere i go women hide in shame
Covering the bruises and numbing the pain
Should she stay cause they share the same name
To scared to leave in case he does it again

Do you think your tough do you tell your mates
Some thing to be proud of something to debate 
I think your weak a sad and sorry case
There’s should be no room for that 
In the human race
Did you kick your cat today do you think it’s fair
Knock your woman to the ground 
And drag her by the hair
Children watch and learn and try to run for cover
And when they get older 
Its how they treat the others

I loved him once she was heard to say
I didn’t believe he could act this way
But society’s hopes and dreams are lost 
and then extracted from the women at a terrible cost
Its not just in the country so don’t be deceived 
If you live in the city don’t feel relieved
It could be your neighbour 
Or your mate down the pub
There are many among us who have joined this club
And afterwards you say your sorry 
but will she tell you begin to worry
So you threaten to kill her 
If she don’t keep, her place 
And just to make sure you smack her in the face
Some might say that alcohol’s to blame 
While women suffer and play this deadly game
But every now and then one up and dies 
And someone’s left to dream up some suitable lies
Suitable lies 
Suitable lies

10000 BIKERS

Well its ten thousand bikers one day
And a wedding the next
One day its loud, thunderous crowds
And then its considerably less
But the feeling’s the same in each of the games
I love it I have to confess
Its ten thousand bikers one day
And a wedding the next
I could have been a banker
Or make plastic buckets for a living
On the jungle floor for some stupid war
Numb to all the killing
But like a pocket knife i chose a life 
That comes out after dark
Tread the boards for the hungry hoards
That’s how I make my mark
Sydney tonight Melbourne tomorrow
That’s a fair drive
I just pray at the end of the day
I am still alive
Where this agent will send me next 
I haven’t got a clue
All i know my darling 
Is i am missing you
So I’ll check the gig load the truck 
And pump it full of fuel
City dweller or traveling man 
Who is the biggest fool
I guess whoever you are whatever you do
May it be your best
Cos its ten thousand bikers one day 
And a wedding the next.


He runs on paws and fours and claws
And makes his lairs using metaphors
Some have cats to chase the rats
Or sit on mats or just get fat
Felines are fine for a time
To dine and whine and purr sublime
One might say they’re hard to match
Cause scratch for scratch none’s a patch
On furry kittens by the batch
With laps and slaps his fish he snaps
And later a catnap perhaps
This flabby tabby sometimes seen in the alley 
Whiskers and friskers  and mewing whispers
In the hall then not at all 
Down the lamp and across the floor
People wear their cats like hats or spats
Or tease like brats these mysterious cats
But i think with a wink 
That while some are pink and others stink

That cats train their owners
Those human moaners
To bring them their food 
And then they elude 
To escape the grasp and hasp
Of their owners possessive moods

Politics it’s a compromise
Took us a while to realize
The road to theLeft which one is right
Cos the road to the Right always ends in a fight

Now here comes a military band
These tin pot leaders are out of hand
The common folk they understand
It’s about money and their fathers land
British Bikes, old German Cars
American made electric guitars
Sitting on a deck with a glass of wine
Watching the birds and passing the time
Talking to you and making up rhymes
Keeps me amused until bed time
Insulates me from all these crimes
And relieves me from this pantomime
TV news and the spotlights glare
Doesn’t quite say what’s really there
Not much truth and pretty bad hair
From the talking heads with the hollow stare
You don’t wanna seem like you don’t care
Bout right and wrong and what’s fair
Or the tug between the bull and the bear
As long as you can get your share
These tragedies are all about
Even now as my hair falls out
Look at how the world got smaller
We got bigger and the buildings taller
Now the race is on to save the planet
And business still will run the gambit
While the experts they try to plan it
The disbelievers are out to ban it.

Have you ever thought how 
A computer screen
Is like a snapshot of your conscious mind 
And how things seem
You can only really see 
One screen at a time
And hold one picture
Momentarily in your mind
Have you ever thought how
Your hard disk space
Is like you subconscious mind
A deep and inaccessible place
Disconnected from one world it only knows
What comes down the line
From circuits stacked in rows
Have you ever thought that the keyboard 
Is like the part of your brain
That can talk all day and still remain the same
And the mouse is your intuitive side
That bypasses language 
So it cant be denied
Have you ever thought how going on line
Might be like the supernatural
And talking to the other side
That this mystic highway
That we begin to see
Is someone else’s way
Of seeing our own reality

If you ever had a thought
Would you be true
The question is not how but what would to do
We made these machines to be like us
A distant reflection of cosmic stardust

I stopped here once with a girl named Sue
Was that someone else or was it you
All those party noises outside my door
But I don’t go there anymore
An empty house, the grass grows tall
Letters scattered across he floor
Dead branches littered the garden bed
Memories flooding back into my head

Bolt down the jetty, with your fishing poles
Find the run where the yellow tail goes
Find a spot and dangle your toes
Watch the seabirds coz the old one knows
A lonely man walks across the sand
A piece of his heart falls from his hand
A green sunset so rare and grand
And still he struggles to understand
Young couples stroll along the pier
Old men hide in their garden of fear
I can see the city from this side of the bay
But I cant make the mist in my eyes go away

What we learn from our kids
Patience trust and how to give
The sweeter simpler things in life
Its how i felt when i met my wife
Discipline and love there’ll be
And when of an age then set free
To meet again another day
All grown up and fly away

As kids we dive in boots and all
We take the pass and run with the ball
We take the ball into the game
And never stop to see whence it came
And neither should they feel their parents sorrow
They will have their own troubles on the morrow
This is what my kids helped me to see
To send them out to be the best they can be
And if in some distant date they show
That their kids have helped them to know
That their parents gave them an inner glow
That’s passed on down and so it goes


This tables got three legs one  is love
A little gift from up above
I remember our younger times
Days when you and i would always shine
Long talks through the night
All the sounds and the sights
We had no choice it was fate
Meet me after work I wont be late
Friendship is the second leg it seems
Working together like a team
And when the passion starts to fall
And the world comes knocking at you door
Things can lead you astray
Words get in the way
At the end of the day
We need nothing  more to say,
We get on well anyway
Its the third leg I'd have to say
Make up in the bathroom
Guitar strings on the floor
All you do is fine
And all my love is yours
And when I'm feeling down
You pick me off the ground
And I hope that I do
The very same for you.
Some say that love  will never last
And friends can keep you trapped in the past
I simply don't agree
This three legged table works for me
You put the kids to bed
I’ll get there when I'm able
I’ll see round
Our three legged table


Well its one two three four
You’ll be Legolas on the floor
All the while he’s keeping score
With a pint of Gimleys ale
East, west, south, and north
In lines of battle back and forth
He's a feisty one, the king of dwarfs
With a pint of Gimleys ale
Well its one two three four
You’ll be Legolas on the floor
But all the while he’s keeping score
With a pint of Gimleys ale
Set em up knock em down
Kick the awks outta town
Long red beard and a surly frown
It’s the pint sized Gimleys ale
In the thick of the fray all is not lost
Before you start to count the cost
He's the dwarf who cant be tossed
Why do you look so pale
Just when you think you cant fight any more
Put em up or its out the door
He’ll give the enemy what for
It’s a pint of Gimleys ale
From all the lands and the kings and queens
In middle earth to the land of dreams
None can keep up it seems
With a pint of Gimleys ale
Amongst the folk who know the tale
Walks the dwarf with the heart of a whale
Leather, studs and chain male
It’s the pint sized Gimleys ale





Folkin' Blues

Folkin' Blues

The Celestial Project

The Celestial Project


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